Blind
by Leather Sky
Summary: Gateau x Chocolat: Only after two of the Hunters learn to move on, do they manage to find harmony with themselves and with the people they love.


****

BLIND

It was the last time.

He had asked him for the thousandth time, and for the thousandth time the answer had been nothing. Not "no," not "that's enough," just his face turning and his figure retreating...without one word. Gateau looked after him, and some part of him knew that _this was it_, so he looked hard. He memorized the way the shadows of the trees played across his back, and the changing planes of his robe as it stretched and relaxed, stretched and relaxed, over his legs as he walked away. He seemed to see every strand of hair at once, and he mapped them all as they moved to match Marron's gait. And then Marron was gone, **again**, and Gateau knew it was for the last time.

He wasn't going to ask again.

In the days after that he debated with himself: what now? He wasn't even sure how long he had been obsessed with Marron…he had lived so many things and grown so much while loving him, wanting him. Now he wondered what part of all those years was his. What had he accomplished, or thought, in all that time, which didn't somehow involve Marron? And what should he do now? Leave? He didn't want to give up his work, but what would it be like working alongside the man that he now knew he would never be with? A selfish reason to leave, though…he could never justify it. Should he just stop thinking about things like that? After all, it had been a long time since he'd even gotten close with anyone…he _was_ doing it because no one but Marron interested him anymore, but maybe he really would be better off without someone. All loving Marron ultimately made him feel was shame. He had failed. He wasn't good enough. He didn't need to feel like that again.

In the end, he didn't come to a solution. He just kept on going. He supposed that making himself get up in the morning and hunt was pretty much noble enough…at least, it was the best he could manage. He stopped giving Carrot trouble. He stopped flirting with Marron. He focused on the job at hand. Whenever they happened into a town and the usual group of girls (or sometimes, amusingly, shameless old women) started to gather around him, he just looked them straight in the eye and gave them a sad smile, and they would melt away soon after that. At night, around the fire, he wouldn't joke anymore. He sat a little apart, talking easily if he was spoken to, otherwise he would be at work carving something or repairing one of the metal plates on his jacket. He punished no one with pointed silence, he tried to keep himself accessible…but part of him was gone.

Nobody probably even would have noticed, had it not been for Carrot's innate curiosity. Gateau was carving something again, slightly away from the fire, and Carrot decided it was high time that he knew what it was. Maybe it was a naked woman or something! Artistically inclined guys were always painting or carving naked ladies, after all…a few visits to the museum had taught him that.

Accordingly, he plopped down next to him.

"Heeeeeey, watcha doin…?"

"Nothing."

"Yeah you are. You're making something. What is it?"

"Nothing."

"Aaaaw, c'mon! You gotta show me! I won't tell anybody…please?"

Gateau sighed, then handed it to Carrot. Carrot eagerly turned it over in his hands for a few minutes, then his brow wrinkled in confusion.

"It's…really cool…is it…uh…abstract, maybe?"

Gateau grabbed it back.

"See? When I said 'nothing,' I wasn't lying!"

"What d'ya mean? I mean, you've been working on it for like…three weeks, it must be _something_ cool, right? I probably just don't see it 'cause I'm not very—"

Gateau started to get exasperated, then just laughed. "No, really. I—I can't decide what to make it, so I just keep carving! _How lame is that?_"

"ARE YOU SERIOUS?" Carrot burst out laughing. They both laughed for awhile, while the other three just stared, wondering what they'd missed.

Then Carrot said it.

"That's just weird, man. 'Course, you _have_ been pretty weird lately, too quiet, you know…I was starting to get worried. But you can still laugh, so it can't be that bad, huh?"

Gateau stopped laughing. "I seemed weird huh?"

"Oh yeah, definitely. I mean, you haven't ripped your clothes off and run around screaming for weeks—which in my opinion is great, by the way, keep it up—but it _is_ kinda weird how you don't seem to care anymore about all those pretty girls who come up to you… I mean, if you don't want 'em, you could at least send 'em my way! Heck, you don't even flirt with Marron anymore—"

Gateau's smile had vanished as Carrot was speaking these words. He looked quickly over at the others. Tira and Chocolat were seething at Carrot's mention of "pretty girls," of course, but Chocolat at least also seemed to have picked up on the other things Carrot had said. He forced himself to look at Marron, and immediately wished that he hadn't. Yes, Marron had definitely heard. Gateau swung back to face Carrot.

"Hey now, that's not true. I mean…it's been getting kind of cold lately, and besides I haven't really been in a flirtatious mood lately anyway. It doesn't _mean_ anything—"

"Oooooooookay. Well, if you need any ideas on what to carve, how about a really pretty girl with huge—"

"CARROT!"

"DARLING!"

"Oh god, ENOUGH! Someone help...OW, KILLING ME...! AAAAAAAH!!"

"…..niisan…"

Gateau watched the drama for awhile and felt mildly bad for having caused it…but ultimately shrugged it off. Hey, at least now everyone would probably forget what Carrot had said earlier. It was hard enough feeling like this, but to have other people know about it…he didn't want to think about it. If only he could hide his feelings the way Marron did…Marron. No, time to cut _that_ line of thought short! Gateau gathered up his things and went to bed, leaving the others to their little game.

He didn't notice that Marron's attention, for once, was divided.

After what his brother had said, Marron decided to keep half an eye on Gateau. Maybe he _was _acting differently…if so, Marron would eventually have to find out why. Anything that affected one Hunter, affected them all. They had to be able to fight together and depend on each other in times of crisis.

He gave it a couple of weeks, and watched Gateau without seeming to. Actually, it was easy—Gateau seemed for once to be completely uninterested in him. He was also more efficient now. In the past, jobs had taken longer because Carrot was off somewhere girlchasing—with the Misu sisters stalking him, of course—and Gateau was either posing for whoever cared to look or trying to get Marron's attention. Now…one of those factors, at least, was removed, and he and Gateau were free to pick up the others' slack. But strangely, even though they ended up spending more time together, they didn't really talk anymore. Marron was at a loss to account for what had changed.

One day after the two of them had tied up a few loose ends in an oppressed village, they decided to bed for the night in a recently deserted hovel. Marron had gone out to find something to eat and came back to find Gateau elbow-deep in soapy water. He was washing dishes, singing something under his breath. Marron walked closer—Gateau hadn't noticed him yet—and he found he could pick out some of the words.

__

I was born in this hotel

Washing dishes in the sink

—Another line, Marron couldn't quite catch it—then:

__

Trying hard not to think…

…A strange song. Marron wondered if it came from somewhere, or if Gateau was just making it up. It was about washing dishes, so maybe he was just singing what came into his head. It was odd, but…Marron had never heard Gateau sing before. He had no idea if Gateau was the kind of person who made up his own words, or knew a lot of songs… It was really kind of beautiful, though. He kept listening.

__

Everything we've done is wrong…

I'll be sorry when I'm gone…

What did that mean? Suddenly Marron hoped that it wasn't Gateau's own words. He decided it was probably a good time to interrupt. He noticed that Gateau had already washed a small pile of dishes…far too many for the two of them. He seemed almost like he was determined to wash all of them…and there were quite a few.

"We only need a couple of dishes, surely."

"Oh. Hey," was all the answer he got. Gateau didn't turn around.

Marron stood there awhile longer. "Are you hungry yet? I found us some supper."

"Thanks, Marron. I guess, could you put it on the table there?" Gateau nodded to his right, without looking around. "I just wanted to finish these first."

Again, Marron looked at the mountain of dishes. "…why?"

"Huh?"

"Why are you doing all of the dishes? We don't _need _them all."

"They'll come back now that we've gotten rid of the Sorcerer. Won't it be cool if they came back and everything was…you know, ready for them? Like a welcome home or something?" He still didn't turn around.

"Gateau…do you think they even **will** come back? Or that they're even still—"

Gateau wheeled around. "Of course, I don't know…! But if they _are_ still alive, and they _do _come back…well…they won't have to worry about the fucking dishes."

Marron answered mildly, "You've splashed water all over your shirt."

Gateau looked down at himself in an unfocused way, then shrugged and flung his shirt onto the table, turning back to the dishes as he did so. "I'll put it by the fire later."

Marron was really interested now, and a bit worried. To his experience, Gateau had never, ever been shirtless in the same room with him without asking him to look at his "beautiful muscles" or flirting with him in some other equally over-the-top fashion. But here he was, half-naked and doing his best to _ignore_ Marron, and not caring if Marron looked at him. Something was very different, all right.

Meanwhile, though, he couldn't very well eat while Gateau was working. Marron sighed inwardly as he rolled up his sleeves and tied his hair back. Then he came and stood next to Gateau and wordlessly started helping. Gateau looked over at him, obviously nonplussed, but Marron didn't say anything…so, after a moment or two he shrugged and grabbed another pan. They stood side by side in the abandoned house, doing the dishes for a family of dead parsoners.

Later that night they sat next to each other, by the fire, eating their (now) cold food, drying their clothes. Gateau was silent, as he had lately become—and it was really starting to play on Marron's nerves. He had to say something.

"That song you were singing…what was it? I'd never heard it before."

"Parsoner song, you wouldn't know it." Gateau kept staring at the fire.

Marron felt stung. The way Gateau had said that—it was like he meant they had nothing in common. But that wasn't true…he hadn't been the only one with a rough past. They all shared a rough past… Perhaps because Gateau had pricked him with his last remark, Marron's next question was something he normally never would have asked.

"What is _wrong with you_?"

Gateau looked mildly back at him, then suddenly put his palms on the floor on either side of Marron's lap and lunged forward. It took Marron completely off guard, and he fell backwards. Gateau's face was inches away from Marron's. He stayed crouched there like a predator guarding its kill. "I dunno, Marron, that's more a question I should ask you. What_is_ wrong with me?"

"…Gateau? What—"

"C'mon, you can tell me. Why aren't I good enough? What am I missing? What should I have done differently?"

"Gateau, I still don't understand!" Marron was really getting anxious now. Was Gateau losing his mind or something? If this kept up, he might have to use magic on him…and that would feel like betrayal.

Gateau abruptly sat back on his heels, giving Marron a chance to straighten up and scoot back a few inches. He looked down, then looked up again, right into Marron's eyes. "You…really don't know?"

"No…what are you talking about?"

Gateau pinched the bridge of his nose—hard. "Hell, maybe I _shouldn't _tell you. Not if you haven't guessed it in…_how_ many years?"

"Guessed _what_? Please, just tell me." Marron risked leaning forward.

Gateau faced him again. "I love you, _genius_."

Marron's jaw dropped. It looked so funny that Gateau couldn't help smiling.

"I wish you could see yourself. Well anyway, here's the thing: I realized a little while ago that you didn't love me and…pretty much never would. Stop me if I'm wrong, by the way."

Marron said nothing.

Gateau sighed. "Yep. And it just sort of, well…I couldn't really go back to how things used to be, after that. If I seem like I've changed, that's why."

Marron had managed to regain some of his composure. After another minute he even attempted speech. "Why didn't you tell me?"

Gateau shook his head. "See, that's just what I mean. I told you—in a million, million ways. All the time. I just figured there was something about me you didn't like…in that way."

"No, it's just—I mean, I really didn't _notice_…! I—" Marron stopped when he saw Gateau's face.

"That's just it. You didn't…**_notice_**…"

Marron didn't know what to say. "I'm…I'm so sor—"

"Spare me. Anyhow, now that you know, let's both do our best to forget it as soon as possible. Agreed?"

"But—we should at least—"

"No, I'm through. You're my friend…end of story. And hey, just think…I won't bug you ever again! 'Marron shall finally know peace.' Heh."

"Gateau—"

"Come on, time to go to bed."

And with that, Gateau unrolled his mat and lay down. Marron looked at him helplessly for a few minutes, but didn't really know what else to do or say. He went to bed.

While Marron and Gateau were busy on their assignment, Carrot, Tira and Chocolat were travelling. They were all to meet up that night in a mid-sized city by the River Skai. The city had a sorcerer that was by all accounts harmless, but Big Mama sometimes sent them to such places simply to keep them active. Trouble can crop up anywhere…it pays to have someone on the spot when the unexpected happens.

As it happened, there _was_ trouble…but it didn't come from the sorcerer.

The day had begun harmlessly enough. They had gone a good distance when they decided to stop for a little rest. They were already following the river, so there was water to drink and the air was somewhat cooler. Carrot had drunk his fill and then lain down on the riverbank, propping his face in his arms…and was consequently asleep in seconds. Tira and Chocolat had smiled at each other and watched him for awhile, but then Tira spoke up hesitantly.

"Sister…do you think we have time to wash up a little?"

"Why would you want to do that, Tira? We'll be in town tonight. You can have a hot bath!"

Tira looked down and nodded. "I know…but its been at least _two days_ since we got the chance…and I just can't look at all that beautiful sparkling water any longer and not…I want to get cleaned up…!"

Chocolat sighed and rolled her eyes. Tira could be such a neat freak sometimes…her and Marron were both pretty bad about it. "I could care less. If you want I can keep an eye on Darling here while you take a quick dip…"

Tira's eyes lit up behind the lenses, and Chocolat found her irritation evaporating.

"Thank you, Sister!"

"Yeah, yeah…make it quick, eh?"

Tira very quietly and modestly undressed and slid into the river. Chocolat was impressed by the way she somehow managed to do it without showing anything. First she was in her robe, there was a silent flash of red and then she was in the water and the robe was on the bank. Chocolate stretched her arms over her head absentmindedly. Why was Tira so shy? She certainly had nothing to be shy about…she was just as pretty as Chocolat, after all, and everybody knew that one of these days Darling would finally notice and pick one of them…Darling! She needed to be watching him.

Accordingly, Chocolat turned to look at Carrot.

Carrot wasn't asleep any longer…he was watching Tira. Chocolat gritted her teeth and prepared to dispense the appropriate punishment…but something made her pause for a moment. Carrot was completely unaware that Chocolat had seen him, and she wanted to watch him, just for a second.

She had never seen Carrot like this. When faced with any girl other than Tira or Chocolat, Carrot was a tangled mass of hormones, charging ahead with supreme optimism. He never managed to be quiet, or smooth…he always scared the girls off. With Tira or Chocolat, on the other hand, he was always running in the **other** direction, protesting that they were like his _sisters_, or screaming and trying to avoid the whip. The way he was now—it made her feel cold.

He was perfectly quiet and still. The only thing to show that he was awake was his eyes: they regarded Tira without blinking. Chocolat had never really seen his eyes like that before; he seemed so intent. Tira made some sort of movement and part of her was visible for a moment…Chocolat watched motionlessly as Carrot's eyelids flickered and his chin ducked slightly behind his folded arms. A little color came to his cheeks and she realized he was ashamed…but he didn't look away. Then Tira bent to wash her hair, and Carrot finally seemed to decide that he should stop watching. He looked at the ground for a moment—he was frowning rather deeply—then he closed his eyes again and nestled his head in his arms, trying to get back to sleep.

Chocolate stayed frozen. Carrot…had never, never looked at _her_ like that. She had given him the chance plenty of times, too…he had certainly seen more of Chocolat than what he had caught in that brief glimpse of Tira. Suddenly she was remembering things in an ugly flood of images that she didn't want to see…but they came anyway. Tira, hurt, and Carrot holding her in his lap, the way he had looked at her then…the way he talked to her sometimes, the way she talked to him, looked at him…

Tira was climbing out of the river now. Chocolat decided that it would be better not to let either of them know what she had seen. She didn't want to alarm her shy baby sister, and as for Carrot…she was curious to see what he would do. So, she pretended to wake him up and he pretended to wake up, and they set out for the city.

On the surface, the rest of their walk was the same as the first half…but Chocolat thought that Carrot was a little quieter than he should have been, and that he glanced over at Tira more often than usual. When they finally got to the town, her worst fears were realized. As they were checking into the hotel Big Mama had assigned as their meeting-place, a couple of pretty young girls walked through the lobby...and Carrot didn't notice. It was the nail in the coffin. Suddenly, Chocolat knew, _knew_ the answer to the big question, even though her sister and Carrot clearly still had no idea. It was Tira.

It was Tira.

It was Tira.

She turned and walked back out of the lobby so abruptly that the others didn't notice for a few moments…by the time they did, they had no idea where she could have gone.

"Well _that's_ weird. We finally get the rooms, and now Chocolat's gone! Think she went to the ladies room or something?"

"I don't know…I'll look."

Tira and Carrot failed to find her anywhere in the hotel. Suddenly they both got a little worried. They agreed to split up and look around the city. Chocolat could be impulsive at times…maybe a shop or something else interesting had caught her eye.

Carrot was the first to find her. "Hey! Chocolat! What are you doing just walking around like that? You had Tira and me scared…" Chocolat had been aimlessly wandering down the street, almost sleepwalking. Upon hearing Carrot's voice she turned and looked at him with unfocused eyes. When he mentioned "Tira and me," though, the life returned to her eyes and she looked almost scary. Carrot inadvertently stepped back…but then Chocolat smiled and he smiled back nervously.

"Chocolat? Chocolat…you are okay, aren't you?"

"Darling. I'm sorry. Let's get back to the hotel. Here, I know a shortcut. I found it while I was walking around." She plunged into a nearby alley.

Carrot had no desire to go into dark scary alleys, but he didn't want to lose sight of Chocolat again. He was still worried about her—he couldn't just leave her alone when she was acting so strange. So, he followed.

Sometime later, Chocolat emerged from the alley...alone. She was now in her hat and suspenders, but she didn't even notice the cold. She made for the hotel. Tira had returned there awhile ago, unsure of where else to search. She was getting very concerned…first Chocolat and now Carrot were missing! Perhaps there _was_ suspicious sorcerer activity here…but then her beloved sister appeared and her fears were immediately banished.

"Sister, why are you dressed like that? Did Carrot—"

Chocolat looked at Tira's inquisitive face for a few moments before slowly replying: "…yes. He was girlchasing again and being an absolute _beast_, so I…punished him a little. I left him out there to think over his actions. He'll be fine," she added, when she saw Tira's concern.

"Well, you know best, sister. Its getting late, shall we go to bed?"

"You go ahead, Tira. I think I'll have a drink or two first."

"All right, don't drink too much—oh, I almost forgot! Marron and Gateau are already here! I think they went to get something to eat."

"Well, that's good. Maybe I'll run into them while I'm out."

They wished each other good night and Tira left. When Tira was out of earshot, Chocolat's shoulders sagged and she sighed deeply. Talking with Tira—acting normal—had been absolute torture. Then there was the prospect of sleeping in the same room with her later… Chocolat didn't know if she would be capable of looking across at that innocent, sleeping face without shaking Tira awake and screaming _why_, **_why did he pick you?_** You never went after him, you never told him how you felt, so why does he want _you_?

Chocolat was not angry with Tira, though, and that made everything much worse. She was not looking forward to seeing her little sister tomorrow and not even being able to resent her…or even act like she knew. Worse yet, when Carrot finally did realize how he felt, he would have to tell Tira…and Tira would come to _her_. Tira would never do anything without asking Chocolat, Chocolat was quite sure of that. She knew very well that she would eventually be forced to speak the words that would mean she had lost Carrot forever…and it just seemed like too much.

She really needed a drink.

It was when she was searching her pockets to make sure she had enough money that she realized she had no room key. Of course—she had stormed out of the lobby earlier before the others had gotten the keys. She cringed. It _might_ have at least been possible, from an emotional standpoint, for her to handle sneaking into their room later that night when Tira was asleep. But to have to wake Tira up, and be asked about her night, and all the rest of it…she just couldn't. There must be another way…

"Hey Chocolat!" Gateau's voice, warm and familiar.

They were sitting outside one of the teahouses Chocolat had passed earlier that day. Gateau smiled and waved her over, while Marron looked pleased to see her but also a little apprehensive. Of course—he must be wondering how bad she had worked Carrot over _this_ time. If he only knew…Chocolat put on the best smile she could manage and came to sit at their table.

"Hey, not that I mind the look, but isn't it a bit chilly out for the suspenders?" Gateau seemed chatty...Chocolat wondered how much he and Marron had actually spoken to each other over the course of their assignment.

"It's been a rather trying day," Chocolat muttered noncommittally.

"By which I assume you mean _Carrot_ was very trying today." Gateau chuckled. Want some tea?"

"No…" Chocolat leaned forward, seemingly to examine Gateau's drink. Her right hand brushed his jacket for a moment. "…What kind are you boys drinking?"

"Oh, I've forgotten the name of it already. It's pretty good…and still warm too. Sure you don't want a sip?"

Chocolat straightened up. As she did so, she transferred Gateau's room key from her right palm to her right pants pocket. "No, I don't think so. In fact, I think I might just head for bed…now that you mention it, it _is_ rather cold out tonight…" She stood up and half-waved as she spoke, then turned and headed back to the hotel. Having a drink suddenly didn't seem as important as finding somewhere dark and locking out the world for a few hours. Tomorrow she would face Tira, apologize to Darling—no, it was Carrot now—for beating him up like that…but just for tonight maybe she could hide from everything…hide from herself.

Gateau sipped the rest of his tea. "Chicks. As long as I live, I'll never understand 'em…"

Marron sighed. He was worried about Carrot. Chocolat dressed like that generally meant one thing: a severely injured older brother. "Gateau, I've got to go find my brother."

"Sure. I could do with some sleep, myself. Oh—think you'll need any help?"

"No, I don't think so…we'll see you back at the hotel."

"Sure."

Marron never had much trouble finding his brother. When intuition didn't work, there was always magic. This time he didn't understand where he was being led though…an alley? He walked faster, his anxiety increasing as he unwillingly pictured what might have happened to Carrot there. As it was, he almost stumbled over him. Carrot was curled on his right side on the floor of the alley, his back against the wall.

"NIISAN?!"

"….Marron….that you…? Thank….god…"

Marron fell to his knees next to Carrot. He was really bad this time. Marron ran his hands over him quickly, then allowed himself to relax a fraction…nothing he couldn't fix. But still—"Who _did_ this to you, niisan?"

Carrot grew quiet. Marron grew alarmed, thinking his brother had fainted, but as his eyes adjusted to the darkness he realized that Carrot's eyes were open and he was avoiding Marron's gaze.

"Niisan…you have to tell me what happened."

Carrot tried to shrug but was greeted with so much sudden pain that he gasped without meaning to. "Well, you know…I mean…its just Chocolat…I'm sure I must have done…_something_…right?"

"Chocolat attacked you…here? But surely you weren't flirting with anyone _here_…"

"N-no…I don't thinkI…did…flirt with anyone today…but there must have been a reason…Chocolat isn't _like_ that…nnnh…" Speaking was too painful and Carrot subsided. Marron's jaw set and he helped Carrot to his feet.

Chocolat stormed down the hall and flung open the door to Gateau's room. Once she was inside, she locked it. If Gateau tried to get into his room later, she'd snarl that she wanted to be left alone, and he'd surely understand… She took off her hat and looked at it. _He'd_ given it to her. Suddenly she wanted to tear it to pieces. She didn't get the chance, though.

"What the…DAMN!" That was Gateau's voice, outside the door. He must be discovering that his key was gone.

She called through the door. "It's okay, I'm in here…but I really need to be left alone. Could you maybe share a room with…" She stopped. Gateau had been acting strangely around Marron, and she couldn't bring herself to say Carrot's name.

"Chocolat? What the hell are you doing in my room? Let me in!"

"NO! I'm sorry, Gateau, but could you _please_ just go?"

"You took my key."

"DAMMIT, JUST LEAVE!"

She listened for his reply, but there was silence. After a minute she shrugged and fell back on the bed. _Finally_!

The door very gently imploded.

She sat up, enraged. Gateau was standing with his back to her, trying to fix the door. When he turned around to speak to her again, she lashed out at him. He reflexively caught the wire in his left hand. It moved with enough speed to cut through his glove like butter.

He looked down at it for a moment, then winced and peeled the glove off (and out) of his hand. Then, with his good hand, he silently fished around in his jacket for some fighting bandages. When he found one he began to wrap it tightly around his left hand, and as he wrapped it he spoke again.

"So. What's wrong, anyway?"

Chocolat just gaped at him, her anger replaced by shame. "I'm…I'm sorry…!"

"Huh? Oh. Anyway, what's the matter?"

"I don't want to talk about it, okay? I'm really sorry I hurt you, but please, I just want to be alone…that's why I took your room."

"You don't want to talk to Tira? She always makes you feel better, doesn't she?"

Chocolat lowered her head, and Gateau realized she was crying. No, obviously that had been the wrong thing to say.

"Look…is this because of Carrot?"

How could he just _say_ it like that? Anger welled up again in her, partially, and she lifted her tear-streaked face to yell at him. "SHUT UP! What would you know about it anyway?" Her head fell back to her chest.

"Well…if this is about how it feels to love someone more than anything, and then to have them not love you back…yeah, I know _all_ about it."

Meanwhile, Marron had just finished patching Carrot up, and he was angry. Chocolat had gone off on Carrot…with no provocation…and beaten him so badly that Marron couldn't remember the last time he'd seen Carrot this way. Marron tucked his sore older brother into bed and went off to have a serious talk with her.

He knocked on the Misu sisters' door, and waited impatiently for a reply. After an uncomfortable interval, Tira tumbled out. She had obviously been sleeping. "Marron…? What's…can I help you?"

"I would like to speak with your sister." Marron's voice shook with anger, but Tira was too tired to notice his lapse in composure. "Sister? Chooooocolaaaaaaat…oh! I don't understand, she's not here!" She blinked and looked around the room again.

A little of Marron's anger faded just watching Tira…she was quite adorable. In the end he told her not to worry and to go back to bed. Then he set his jaw and went to find Gateau. Maybe he had seen where she went.

He came to Gateau's door and stopped abruptly. It was no longer on its hinges, but it had been turned slightly and wedged into the doorframe so that no one except Gateau could have possibly opened it again. What on earth…? Then he heard Chocolat's voice.

"Then I guess you must know…_exactly_ how I feel, don't you…?

Gateau's voice answered, strangely quiet. "Yes, I do…look, I'm sorry it's been such a long time since I've said this…but, you're beautiful."

Chocolat spoke again, but it was too low for Marron to make out. Annoyed and ashamed at the same time, he pressed closer to the door.

Gateau's voice, now. "—couldn't do that…I mean, you promised yourself that you'd only—"

**__**

Why did they have to whisper?

Chocolat's voice: "—doesn't matter. I want to now…with you."

Marron tensed. What? What did she want to do with him…what were they talking about? He listened, but now they weren't even whispering anymore…he didn't hear a thing.

Then…something. A soft sound, it must have come from Chocolat.

A rich, low chuckle…Gateau's voice again. "Just don't call me 'Darling.'"

Marron's fingers caged against the door…but now he could hear more sounds, and once they had started they didn't cease. Mostly Chocolat, but in between…he heard _him_…

Marron shut his eyes hard and peeled away from the door. And he walked off down the hallway…but there was no one now to watch him go.

Carrot was asleep when Marron got back to their room. He sighed as he looked at his brother. Now that Carrot was completely relaxed, he had that air of beauty and perfect innocence that Marron often wished the others could see. Carrot only seemed to feel the outward affects of all this drama…he felt it when Tira and Chocolat beat him, or Gateau closed himself off, but he didn't really understand why they did it. Maybe that was why he could sleep like that. Marron, on the other hand, always ended up finding out the answers why, even when he _didn't_ want to.

He supposed that Chocolat must have a reason for beating Carrot so savagely and then throwing herself at Gateau (this was how Marron's imagination colored things). Tira, on the other hand, had been just like Carrot tonight, innocent. Just like…Carrot… _Tira and Carrot_. Chocolat might have thought that Carrot had finally chosen, and the choice had not been her. That was the only thing Marron could come up with of that would drive Chocolat to the arms of another man, at any rate. Her love for his brother was so all consuming. Maybe she wanted Gateau to make her forget that…

Marron's hands hurt somewhat. He realized that his fists were clenching and unclenching and wondered how long this had been going on. Distracted, he threw open a window and decided to try and get some sleep.

Chocolat and Gateau had been completely unaware of Marron's presence.

After she had told Gateau that she wanted him, and quelled his fears that he was taking advantage of her, they had lost no time. Both of them were very physical people to begin with, and they had not fully understood the toll that their self-enforced abstinence had taken on them. It wasn't hard to get Chocolat out of her suspenders at all, and Gateau had made instantaneous stripping an art form—but they struggled with _each other_'s clothes, and this just fueled their sense of urgency and intoxicated them further. There was a moment of shocked silence when they had succeeded in getting free of everything and sat there looking at each other—Marron had heard this silence and been unable to guess what it meant. But then Gateau had lowered Chocolat onto the bed...and Marron left soon after that.

They had started very slowly. First they just wanted to know more about each other, to feel the strangeness of being this way with a close friend. They had been lying next to each other, kissing, sometimes moving a little so they could mouth the other's throat or shoulder…letting their hands move across each other's bodies in the meantime. Gateau had gradually allowed his uninjured hand to settle between Chocolat's thighs, and he could tell that his gentle movements were starting to have their effect. Chocolat had been stroking him too—but then her touch became rough and sporadic, and finally she just clutched his side. She had been starting to slip off into a kind of haze, but she came out it suddenly when she noticed a new presence pressing against her skin. In the course of touching her and kissing her, Gateau had become fully aroused. Chocolat sat up and looked at it for a moment. Gateau turned his head to watch her and let his hand stay where it had fallen on the bed. He said nothing.

Chocolat pushed her hair behind her ears and bent her face to him. Gateau sat up a little and let his hand rest on the back of her head. Her movements were sparse and hesitant at first, then she gained more confidence. He drew in his breath sharply a couple of times when he felt the brush of teeth—but he didn't say anything, and as she kept going she got better. He made noises to let her know that he liked what she was doing. He wanted to keep watching her, but soon his eyes were closed and his breathing was getting ragged. He realized after she made a certain sound that he was pressing down too hard on the back of her head, and he immediately slid his hand down to where it had been. After a moment his touches made her start to moan, and it added to what she was doing with her mouth—he was getting close. He knew he would have to say something soon, but he put it off—and then she made the decision for him.

Chocolat suddenly fell back onto the bed next to him. He blinked and breathed hard for a moment, but then his mind adjusted. He looked over at Chocolat. She was trying to say something, but he hadn't stopped moving his hand…and she was squirming now.

"…w-want you…to—"

"You want me to—?" Gateau looked down at her, still touching her…she didn't answer right away. He slid down her body a little, then dragged his lips down her left breast and started to suck the nipple.

"_HN_…!"

"….want me…to…_what_…?"

Chocolat's eyes opened wider now, she looked down at him with desperation. Then she made a sound and tugged on the back of his head, dragging him lower. He realized what she meant and went into it immediately. He gently spread her with his good hand and held her right thigh down with his left hand…and then bent his head down. He let his tongue wander around and inside her before he finally settled on the one spot where he knew she wanted him the most. He put gentle pressure on it, but not too much, and he fell into a rhythm, moving his entire head along with his mouth. She bucked under him, and tried to thrash, but he held her down until she came. Then she sank her fingertips into his back and pulled him back up, and asked him for it, **now**, _please_…

And he was a little scared then, because this part was always the hardest. But he kissed her while he touched her to stretch her out, until he thought she could handle it…and then he let her wrap her legs around him and guide him with her hand.

It _was_ difficult, and she wasn't shy, she cried out—but they managed it. He kept it slow until he noticed the tension in her expression melting, and felt her start to relax, even move with him. Then he let himself go a little more—but he was still keeping himself in check until she tightened her embrace and told him that she wanted _everything_…everything that he had. He looked at her. She was flushed, breathing jaggedly…her determined eyes pleaded with his hesitant ones. He gently reached behind his neck and took hold of her wrists. He pinned them to the bed. She threw her head back—

…and somewhere in what followed, the bed broke…but they hardly noticed.

Marron was awakened by the sound of men's voices. He sleepily sat up, shook his head, and moved toward the noise. It was coming from the window. He blinked a few times before the veil of blinding morning light subsided enough to let him see what was happening outside.

Gateau was standing, arms folded, wearing his jeans and that was it. His hair was everywhere and he didn't even have any shoes or socks on…it looked like he'd been dragged out of bed and had just thrown something on. He was alternately talking and shouting at the man standing across from him, whom Marron presumed was the proprietor of the hotel.

The proprietor, on the other hand, shouted and kept shouting. "First the door and now the bed! What are you trying to do, break me here?"

"I said I would pay for it. I'll even haul the stuff out for you and break it into firewood, if that's what you want. Ease up, man!"

" 'Ease up? _EASE UP_??' You **_demolished_** one of my best beds! And the sounds! My god, I didn't sleep all night! The business I'll lose because of you—they won't ever come back!"

"Oh come on, you expect me to believe that? If the sounds bugged you so damned much, why didn't you knock on the frigging door?"

"_I WAS AFRAID FOR MY LIFE_!" The man clutched his chest dramatically.

Gateau rolled his eyes and pulled a beaten brown leather wallet out of his back pocket. "FINE, whatever. How much did you say the bed cost?"

"Two hundred. And the door—"

"Yeah, yeah, and the blasted door, how much was that…"

At this moment Chocolat came out...in Gateau's tank top. (Of course, on her, it was a nightshirt.) Marron frowned when he saw the change that came over Gateau's face. "Hey. How'd you sleep?"

Chocolat smiled. "Just _fine_. Is this little man giving you trouble?"

"See here, young woman! I won't be talked to that way by the **tramp** that left all those scratch marks on my floor! And another thing! I should make you pay for—" He never got a chance to finish. Marron watched in fascination as the "little man" abruptly rose three feet into the air.

Gateau's voice was just loud enough to make out. "…_tramp_?"

Chocolat stuck her tongue out at the proprietor and walked back inside. Gateau waited until he heard the door close behind her, and then launched into a sort of low, staccato dialog with the man that was really just him talking and the man nodding frantically. Marron could make out nothing Gateau said, except "—back in there **_now_** and apologize—" "—if you _ever_—" "—will come _back_ here and…!"

He set the man down. After awhile the proprietor's face resumed a normal color and he could breathe. Gateau looked down at his wallet again. "Now. I'm going to pay you for the bed and the fucking door and the stupid scratches in the floor, and I'm going to take the broken shit outside and chop it up, and you're going to go do_ that other thing we talked about_."

The proprietor nodded his head vigorously and fairly **ran **back into the hotel. Marron watched Gateau carry out the busted door and some pieces that he supposed had once been a bed, and break the wood down. The bedding wasn't even salvageable. Then Gateau started back for the building, running a hand across his now wet forehead. "Fuck, I need a shower." For some reason he looked up as he said this and saw Marron at the window before he had time to pull back. Gateau stopped walking and just looked at him quietly for a moment, then made his gaze level again and went inside.

Marron backed away from the window until he was up against his bed, then let himself fall back onto it. He closed his eyes. So…that was that. He didn't even know how to feel about it. He was determined not to feel hurt or jealous, though…because that would mean he had lost something important, and he didn't like to think that _this_ was what had happened, exactly... So…he would feel detached…maybe a little superior. After all, hadn't Gateau and Chocolat acted like a couple of immature, destructive children? He would never have acted like _that._ No, he decided, he would just do what he had always done…he would watch, and keep himself out of it.

Besides, his brother needed him. That was what he should be focusing on. Marron opened his eyes and turned to look at Carrot, still (somehow) fast asleep. _…Soon, maybe he won't need me anymore either_, Marron thought. He closed his eyes again and stared at the red-black world that appeared as the morning sun hit his eyelids.

__

I'll be sorry when I'm gone…

There was a knock on the door. Marron blinked a couple of times, then went over and opened it.

And there was Gateau.

He nodded at Marron, then looked over at Carrot. "Can I come in?" He whispered so as not to wake him up.

Marron silently stepped aside.

Gateau went over to kneel by Carrot's bed. He carefully brushed aside Carrot's hair and took stock of all the bruises and cuts. Then he sighed and shook his head.

"Marron, I'm so sorry. She didn't…she told me she didn't mean to—"

Marron's face hardened. "Why isn't she saying this herself, then?"

Gateau looked down. "She thinks…Carrot might not want to speak to her again."

"That's silly…" Marron and Gateau looked up, shocked. Carrot had spoken.

"Carrot? Hey, how you doing, buddy?"

"I'm okay. Why does she think I won't want to speak to her though, huh?"

"Niisan…don't you remember what happened? She—"

Carrot shook his head. "I remember. But hey, I'm used to it by now, right? I mean…it's just their way. I don't _like_ it, but…that doesn't change how I feel about them." He smiled painfully.

Marron frowned. Gateau, on the other hand, smiled. "Yeah. Sometimes you just gotta take the bad with the good. You find someone you care about…that's all you need to know about them, really. Nothing else matters." He turned and looked at Marron deliberately. Marron's frown faded—a little. When Gateau turned back to Carrot, he was asleep again.

"Huh. There he goes. Probably dreamin' about girls…well, now I can tell Chocolat that she can come apologize to him later and he won't try and jump out the window."

"I still don't like what happened." Marron crossed his arms over his chest.

Gateau sighed. "I know, I know…there's no excuse. But Marron, you knew this would happen eventually, what with the way they _both_ feel about him and all. Come on, it could have been worse, right?"

Marron looked at him. "You certainly seem to have capitalized off of the situation."

"Oh, so we're going to talk about that, are we."

"I just don't think it's very fair that my brother is lying there with massive injuries while you—you—well for god's sake, I saw the _bed_!"

"Oh really. Did you see _this_?" Gateau ripped off his bandage.

Marron grew quiet. "That's…bad. Why didn't you do anything about it sooner?"

"Maybe this is just egotistical of me…hell, probably is. But—it really seemed like she _needed_ me… So, I just…stayed."

"Sit down."

It took a few spells, but after awhile Gateau's hand was almost normal again. Marron sat back and looked at him as Gateau flexed his hand approvingly. "I guess I just don't understand. She hurt both of you, but you're not even mad. Why?"

Gateau smiled. "Same reason I'm not mad at you. Same reason you're never mad at Carrot."

"But that's not the same! I would never _hurt_ anybody…!"

But Gateau was shaking his head. "We all do it. Hurt each other, I mean. Hell, that look I saw on your face when you were at the window—" Marron flinched when Gateau said that, so Gateau didn't take it any further. "…anyway…It's like I was telling Carrot while he was apparently sleeping. It doesn't _matter_, so long as we still care about each other. I don't think…I'll ever leave." He looked up. "What about you, Marron?"

Marron looked into Gateau's eyes and thought about it. "No…I mean…I might go places and do things alone, someday…but I don't suppose I'll ever really _be_…alone…will I?"

"No. You never have to be alone."

Marron looked down again, closed his eyes. He let out all of his breath at once.

"…Thank you."

He felt Gateau's hand on the back of his neck for a moment…just a moment, and then it was gone. When he opened his eyes again the door was gently closing.

Marron didn't move for awhile, but just stayed in that position, arms crossed, looking down at some spot slightly above the floor…then he got up and went over to Carrot.

There was a lot to do if they were going to be ready for their next assignment in time.


End file.
